There are those people in our life that come and then potentially go. As we grow and age, experience and learn, our individual lives perhaps change, or alter…which I prefer to say. And along this journey we start with friends that come along with us, right from childhood. Some of those friends will stay, and choose to grow with you. Others we will cut ties with, wishing them all the best things in life, but knowing that our journey together had its purpose for what it was, and we will take those lessons with us as we continue our own path and life choices.
We go our separate ways, move provinces or even countries. Meet people along the way that touch our lives in one way or another. And some of those people, may become life long friends. It might not be a “best friend at first sight” sorta thing, but as time goes on and communication stays key, a trust is born and you find yourself “stuck” with one or many of these friends. Which suits me just fine, and I wouldn’t have it any other way!
I met my friend Beth in my early 20’s when we were working together as massage therapists in Banff, Alberta Canada. And at that time we were…friends. I later moved to New Zealand with my partner at the time ( who p.s decided that cheating on me while in NZ was a cool idea…dick move!). I was working 3 jobs and living my best life. A year later and now single with an expired work visa for New Zealand, I decided to move on to Australia. While I was there and still keeping in touch with Beth, I could tell what she was doing back home wasn’t working for her, so I purposed she come and travel Australia with me. It didn’t take any convincing and soon, the adventures of the Canadian wildlings began… And what a time we had!
We both had jobs working on Green Island, which is on the doorstep of the Great Barrier Reef. We were massage therapists at their luxurious resort and day spa, and let me just say…while the resort itself truly was ( and still is) luxurious, there was nothing “luxurious” about Beth and I!! It brings tears to my eyes with humor, thinking back to the sheer debauchery ( that usually started on the journey home on the ferry ride having bubbles and sharing laughs with Peter, someone we quickly knew would become part of our whirlwind Australian odyssey) that we would get up to the nights before our work days, and the pain we would be in, suffering through the demanding work day that followed. But there we were, in the moment, living our best lives and growing a friendship that would surely last us a lifetime.
We got tattoos with words that mean something to us, and our bond.
No matter where we lived while in Australia, whether it was together or separate, we were two peas in a pod. We didn’t do much without each other. What one went through, the other did too. Whether that was indirectly or not. We grew along side one another, we fought, shared stories, and partied like it was our job. And somehow made it out alive! More importantly though, we made it out with our friendship intact. Towards the end of our Australian odyssey, we had pity taken upon us by a house full of guys. No, they weren’t just some random guys we met at a pub, we had a great friend who knew them well, and asked if they would be gracious enough to allow two wild and crazy Canadian girls to crash at their place for the unforeseeable. And for whatever reason they agreed, silly bastards, LOL !!! These guys turned out to be some of the top “blokes” I know to date! Beth and I had some amazing times running a muck, hitting up the local pubs and making a lifetime of memories and friendships with these amazing men. But like most things in life, this had to come to an end. Our visas were up and being broke is one thing, but we were FLAT broke. So with many tears and broken hearts off home we flew. She to Winnipeg and me to Nova Scotia.
Time went on. Personal growth and development was life’s focus. We went on to met our husbands, have children, move countries, experience health issues and live! All the while keeping in touch as often as we could and supporting one another with anything that would pop up. Fast forward through 14 years of friendship, and here we were catching up face to face, in New Zealand! Beth had made the long ass journey to celebrate my 40th with me. And can I just tell you all that are reading this, it was one of the most valuable times I will ever have in my life. I say that because, while we knew we’d pick right up where we always leave off, its just so amazingly important to know that you still have that connection with someone. That through it all, this connection is something to be reckoned with. It’s extremely heart warming, emotional, and connective. Nothing will ever come between that.
Never mind the exploring and new memories that are being made, but its the being able to lay in bed with each other, laugh until you cry about stupid shit you did in the past, and love one another for all that is perfectly imperfect about each of you, is nothing short of special. There are those people and those friendships that just know you better than anyone else, especially your family. They know your deepest darkest secrets, and fears. They know all the little things that make you tick, and do all of this without an ounce of judgement. They prove to you over and over again, that no matter what, and no matter where, this bond is one that will never be broken.
I wanted to write this post for her. While she knows how important she is to me, because I tell her often, and vice versa, I just wanted to share with anyone who reads this, just how much I truly do love her, and just how much a true, genuine friendship really means to someone. My life feels fuller, blessed and complete because of her friendship. Beth has always, and is ALWAYS there for me. In any way she can be, and that means more than words could ever begin to explain to me. She has brought loyalty to my life that I hope others have the chance to experience. When I was diagnosed with cervical cancer, I of course wanted to share my horrifying news with her straight away, but I knew it would break her heart. That alone says so much about her character. And as my sickness went on, she would always, and still always says, “WE will get through this TOGETHER”. As I sit and write this, it brings tears to my eyes thinking about it, because those words have got me through some pretty lonely times.
We are lucky enough to be put on this earth for whatever reason, and we have a duty to ourselves to fill our lives with people that bring something to it. We owe it to ourselves to make sure we don’t do ourselves a disservice by choosing friends that will only take, take, take. Being friends with someone should feel much like a marriage commitment. It should be a commitment based on brutal honesty, loyalty, and respect. And sure not all of your friendships will last a lifetime, but the ones that do, deserve attention, understanding and above all else, love.
So Beth, here is to YOU. My long distance wife for life! Thank you for being my ride or die, for loving me endlessly to the moon and back, and for ALWAYS showing up…
No matter where…no matter what…I love you X
